For those with nagging girlfriends and high maintenance wives, Valentines Day and its spendy accouterments: flowers, chocolate, cards, pricey dinners, and lingerie (hey, it ain’t all bad), can tear a man apart. If the cold February chill doesn’t kill you, your bruding-er half will. Recently, my church, The Globe’s English Evangelical Papal Ministry Synagogue, has been handing out iPod touches loaded with My Virtual Girlfriend to stem the tide of February divorces, and good thing, too: every man here has at least two girlfriends AND a wife. It can get messy.
My virtual girlfriend hammers any lump of a man into a finely chiseled woman-pleaser. You’ll practice buying flowers, flirting, kissing, cleaning, camping, rinsing and repeating – with the express goal of pleasing. WET Productions haven’t made it easy, either. Your virtual Girlfriend can be tailored to be as clever or as ditzy as you wish, but pleasing her, that is the real task.
It works great on any iDevice at any resolution, though I suggest unplugging your nice earphones as the sound is tosh. No matter how cute, your virtual girlfriend talks like Yoda’s female incarnate. To top that off, she speaks in cleveresque riddles and pick up lines – definitely a George Lucas leftover. Overall, for 99 cents, My Virtual Girlfriend represents a LOT of gameplay and for the louts in our readership, the fulcrum on which your marriage might be saved. If after buying diamonds and dresses for your analogue, you find too few pennies in your pocket, you can spring for the LITE version, too, but I’ve not heard that it saves marriages.
By the way,