Phonympics in Review – Glutton for Punishment

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Prior to my review of Ping Pong, for several months, I have been playing another game off and on. Phonympics is hardly the fruity sounding app, but let me tell you, it redefines fruity gameplay. I am ready to say that Ajit did not do their homework when they decided to sell this game. Phonymics could have taken more cues from the excellent Track and Field for the famicom of years back or more contemporary hints from Dance Dance Revolution. Alas, Phonmypics is just Tap Tap, without the revolution.

So, what is this game?
The basic idea of a tap-sports games is to get some much needed exercise into your two longest fingers or  the fat ones that people call opposable thumbs. I had trouble with the latter. Though admittedly, I can be caught bragging about my deft digits, the left and right could not time together well enough to really outperform my digital colleagues inPhonmypics. The game is a gamut of races from 100 metres to 1500 metres and though everything about this game is poorly executed, the fatigue a runner experiences in a race is adroitly emulated. Well, something has to be as Phonmypics is nothing but ‘running’.

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Definitely necessary

Easy, Medium, Hard – along with Sound On/Sound OFF – those are your options, so use them wisely. I will admit that though I am swift, Hard was just a damn bit too Donnovan Bailey for me. I regard myself as more of a Micheal Johnson and found that Easy or Medium was just enough exertion that I did not have to pull out and ruin an international Track and Field tournament.

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So, get ready. If you have turned off the sound, you won’t be bothered too much by the PC-speaker-style beeps, boops and silly music. All you have to do is coordinate your two fingers in fast-action tapping. I suggest using your index and middle fingers (assuming they are not too unequal in length) for best running performance.

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just under 10", not bad for the 100m, eh?

Phonymypics has not been updated since its debut and I rather doubt that emailing the devs will avail anything now. My version has worked up until some nearly spring-day in March which seemed to unthaw the otherwise working app into a practice-mode only repetitious mess. Tourneys have not been possible despite restarts, reboots, refreshes and new OS updates. ‘shigzeo’ did not work in the player input field and neither did the next one (sigh). Naturally, for months now, I have only been able to practice as the game will not go past the player entry screen. What can I say? Ajit just wanted my money to make a down payment on their boarding school room and escape to another country.

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Conclusion
For 99 cents, Phonmypics is a waste of space on your springboard and hard disk. Fortunately, it has some cutish graphics and if you value nostalgia no matter the cost to quality, then Phonmypics may actually treat your finger-diet to some hardy exercise. How can I put it? If there was only one event to the Olympics and it was running, would it be worth to brave the streets of London in 2012? I rather think not in any time of year, but certainly not now. Phonympics has taught me that less is less is less.

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Not sure how this is supposed to work

Don’t bother. This is an app for the bin and deserves to be wiped from your iDevice.

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App Summary
Title:Phonmypics (v1.0)Developer:Ajit
Price:$0.99App Size:1.5 MB
  • Intuitive interface
  • Smooth & Responsive
  • Powerful and useful tools
  • Beautiful results
  • Lacks hue/brightness options

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More evidence of Rubbish Goings on?
Ping Pong in Review – Iz She Expensive in Review – AT&T say no go to GoPhone, Prepaid iPhone– Questioning the Validity of Issue-Prone Software – No Reply from Apple Costs Dev 600 000 – Biting the Hand that Feeds You,Nothing New at the App Store – Worse than Wipe – Four Apps for the Can

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